A Mother's Reflections:

Reflections on My Son's Achievement to the Rank of Black Belt

1. The maturity that he gained from the very angry little six year old who was given to tantrums when he did not win, to a young man who can now take on most contests with "I did my best, but it is OK not to win every time."

2. The "obedience" he learned by having to attend all of the classes necessary to gain the various belts on the way to black.  He did not always want to go to class, but after we talked about it, the realization began to hit that in order to reach a goal, one must continue to work at it every day, and not give up.

3. The feeling of reaching a "goal".  So often our youth say, "I really want to do this or that", and then by not making it a goal for themselves, they set themselves up for failure and do not have the feeling that goes along with actually reaching the goal.  The change in my son since achieving a Black Belt is great, in that he is willing to tackle anything, because within himself, he knows that he has already achieved a major personal goal.

4. The hard days were well worth it for both of us.  There were times that, as a mom, I thought to myself, "Is it really worth it, having him go to class, when he wants to play Nintendo with his friends, or play, or whatever?"  I can look back now and see that the stress that we went through at the time really has paid off.  He sees that too, as he still plays with the friends and has achieved a major personal goal in life as well.

5. The high expectations of Sensei Mike Burke, to help the students achieve the highest standards--not only in the martial arts, but school, home, and personal life as well--is reason enough to keep your child in the program.  My son is far from perfect in keeping his room clean, remembering to do his chores, picking up after himself, but he has a standard I set for him to which we as parents can refer, when we are trying to teach these things at home.

6. It is not just the "belts", but the "discipline" that the student learns as he/she progresses through the ranks.  My son had many difficult times while trying to discipline himself to control his temper and his unrealistic expectations of himself.  At one point, he had to give up his belt and be reduced a rank for a time.  This was very difficult for him, particularly when he had to face the others in his class.  I could have said, "You can quit, rather than face the embarrassment of continuing, etc.". Rather than do that, he learned that he had to face up to the fact that he was in a state of "learning" to control himself.  When he explained that to the other students, it helped them, too.  They realized that discipline is a serious thing--which has "consequences".

As a parent of a serious "karate kid", really consider seriously the commitment of helping your student achieve his goal of "black belt".  There are ups and downs, times they want to quit, not go to class, or just complain, but if you can commit, with your child, that this is a huge personal goal to attain, I am certain that you will find that the young person who comes through at the end, is someone whom you can be very proud of.  I know that I am very proud of my son.